Dear Lunch,
Thank you for being so good today. You were healthy and fresh, and I didn't feel tired after eating you.
Thanks again,
Twyla.
Dear Debit Machine,
I just was wondering about how come you broke today? You're holding up the lines and customers are getting angry at Josh and it's not even his fault.
Please fix yourself soon,
Twyla.
Dear Glenn,
Lunch was fun today, hey? I'm glad when we can hang out even if it is only for half an hour, and even if all we do is complain about our jobs, etc.
You're one of the good ones,
Twyla.
Dear band called "fuck",
Why did you do that? That is a bad name, and I think that it will make less people like you. Also, with a name like that, Mom's can't like you.
Twyla.
Dear Scooter,
Remember this morning when I fell down on my bed and held my head in my hands because I was so sick from being drunk? And then you came up and purred at me and I felt a little better? I just wanted to say that was awesome.
Love, Twyla.
Dear Mom,
I got you that K.D. Lang CD that you were asking for. Ha Ha.
Love, Twyla.
Dear Dad,
Hey - I got Mom a K.D.Lang CD! Ha ha.
Love, Twyla.
Dear Johnny Cash,
Remember when you died last year? That was such a sad day. I cried, and tons of people were really sad at my work. You are still one of our best sellers. I read your book, and sorry to say - it wasn't as good as the Motley Crue biography!
love, Twyla.
Dear Bil,
Is that whole pizza for you? It amazes me how you can eat like that, but still be so trim. Lucky.
Twyla
Dear Customers,
Quit bugging me with phone calls and questions.
Twyla.
Dear Craig,
Hi, Boyfriend! You're really cute. You brought me that bag of popcorn today, and it was awesome. It gave me gas though! See you tonight,
xo Twyla.
Dear Wade,
I'm glad you're quitting smoking. It will stunt your growth!
Twyla.
Dear Limo Prize Pack,
Thank you for letting me win you. I hope you don't mind 10 rowdy chicks in the back of you next Thursday. But wait - I don't even know 10 rowdy chicks...?
Twyla.
Dear Chicks,
Are you rowdy? Want to come in a limo with me next Thursday? Let me know,
Twyla.
